I think the reason for this is that there are so many do's and don't's and general confusion about what is a come on, what is flirting, what is rape etc. It is easier to speculate and not make a move than deal with the potential social consequences of being up for harrassment.
I can see from a male's poing of view how it could be hard to know whether a girl is flirting, joking or serious, as different people draw different boundaries. When I was 11, I got pounced on by someone who I mistakenly thought was just being a friend. Obviously my judgement wasn't well developed at that age. This incident freaked me out alot for a number of years, however it was one of the best things that ever happened to me as it taught me alot of stuff.
One of the things it taught me is that it's best to be wholey specific about what your intentions are with someone, as unromantic and blunt as it may seem, telling someone "I want to sleep with you, if that's at all possible" is far simpler in the long run. I have made this a policy of mine for a while, and I find it successful. If you put the disclaimer in there that there really is a way out, and you won't think any less of the person as a result, then that gets you off the hook for being a sleeze. Well that's what Kerry does anyway.
As far as the news and stuff, I found that happened to me even with soap operas and dramas on TV. Even though I knew it was real, I couldn't help caring. I had to stop watching TV because it was too emotional for me. Even now, I try to stick to things that are either about the past, or about something that won't effect me, like a singing contest. I find reading headlines on the net makes things a bit less personal; you don't see the people and you don't get the journalist's dramaticising for you.
no subject
I can see from a male's poing of view how it could be hard to know whether a girl is flirting, joking or serious, as different people draw different boundaries. When I was 11, I got pounced on by someone who I mistakenly thought was just being a friend. Obviously my judgement wasn't well developed at that age. This incident freaked me out alot for a number of years, however it was one of the best things that ever happened to me as it taught me alot of stuff.
One of the things it taught me is that it's best to be wholey specific about what your intentions are with someone, as unromantic and blunt as it may seem, telling someone "I want to sleep with you, if that's at all possible" is far simpler in the long run. I have made this a policy of mine for a while, and I find it successful. If you put the disclaimer in there that there really is a way out, and you won't think any less of the person as a result, then that gets you off the hook for being a sleeze. Well that's what Kerry does anyway.
As far as the news and stuff, I found that happened to me even with soap operas and dramas on TV. Even though I knew it was real, I couldn't help caring. I had to stop watching TV because it was too emotional for me. Even now, I try to stick to things that are either about the past, or about something that won't effect me, like a singing contest. I find reading headlines on the net makes things a bit less personal; you don't see the people and you don't get the journalist's dramaticising for you.