Do you take antidepressants? A lot of what you describe as "emotinal pain" sounds like what I've learned to identify as "artificial emotion" and a sign of a physical/chemical problem. If it comes in waves and *really* doesn't make sense at the time there's a good chance that it's the body, not the soul in trouble. The pills can reduce the artificial waves, and training can help to sort the real from the rest. For me at any rate...

BTW I like "skinship" :-)