Thank you very much for this post, it strikes to the core of something I've been struggling for a month or two.
You're welcome. I'm in the habit of taking an 'opt-in' approach to physicality and/or relationships. On one hand, it avoids me making a mistake that might hurt or confuse someone, on the other hand it puts the onus on the other person to make things clear, which they may not do if they don't think I feel the same way. Or are shy.
These days I try to be clearer about where I am with things. I try to let friends know if I fancy them (though I'm generally crap at actually coming out and saying it) in as non-threatening a way/situation as possible, so they know that, if they at least want to talk about things, I'm open to it.
Your situation is an hard one, and I fully understand how the confusion has a knock-on effect.
And yes, I try to be as discrete as possible when using quotes from screened folks. Sometimes they're needed so that folks know that it's their comment I'm replying to, and to provide context for some things I'm saying.
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Date: 2008-04-29 11:02 am (UTC)You're welcome. I'm in the habit of taking an 'opt-in' approach to physicality and/or relationships. On one hand, it avoids me making a mistake that might hurt or confuse someone, on the other hand it puts the onus on the other person to make things clear, which they may not do if they don't think I feel the same way. Or are shy.
These days I try to be clearer about where I am with things. I try to let friends know if I fancy them (though I'm generally crap at actually coming out and saying it) in as non-threatening a way/situation as possible, so they know that, if they at least want to talk about things, I'm open to it.
Your situation is an hard one, and I fully understand how the confusion has a knock-on effect.
And yes, I try to be as discrete as possible when using quotes from screened folks. Sometimes they're needed so that folks know that it's their comment I'm replying to, and to provide context for some things I'm saying.