I'll join the chorus of people who agree with this totally.
I know my (and my partner in evil's) biggest sin is, neither of us are proud of it, and we are still both judged in various ways and scared to go close to that circle ever again. Even the judgee who broke the news to the community of concern has admitted that that in itself was a sin to do, as in respect for myself and my partner-in-evil's long term reputations.
But from what I can tell, it seems to be worse in a hobby society group thing rather than in a disability group. In a hobby society, people seem to find it easier to deamonise people because they feel ike if they push someone hard enough they can push someone out, which of course backfires when that person is strong or brutally stubburn enough to go "fuck this, I'm staying" and then everyone else gets more angsty and miserable, rather than figuring out how to work around that person's faults.
In contrast, my experience of disability groups seems to be that we have to be a bit more tolerant and understanding of each other, because you know that you are going to know, and need to put up with, these people for the rest of your life. Come what may, you can't stop being part of that disability group. So even though you don't agree with a whole bunch of things someone does, or has done, you still have to figure out on what level you relate to them or can be civilised with them, so it doesn't appear that you are having a go at them all the time, because that gets tedious pretty quickly.
Just my ovservations anyway.
It would be an interesting experiment, to have a post where you invite people to annonymously fess up to their worse sin; giving context of the situation without revealing names and places. You wouldn't want people to publicly judge each other as a result, even annonymously, because that could hurt people, but it would be interesting to see what people thought of each other's crimes, when they were faceless. Or you could do it in a way where the rules are, if you post your sin, you open yourself up to having any annonymous criticism levelled at you. I for one would be interested to see what random people who didn't know the people or circumstances involved, thought of my supposed sin.
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Date: 2010-03-04 12:48 am (UTC)I know my (and my partner in evil's) biggest sin is, neither of us are proud of it, and we are still both judged in various ways and scared to go close to that circle ever again. Even the judgee who broke the news to the community of concern has admitted that that in itself was a sin to do, as in respect for myself and my partner-in-evil's long term reputations.
But from what I can tell, it seems to be worse in a hobby society group thing rather than in a disability group. In a hobby society, people seem to find it easier to deamonise people because they feel ike if they push someone hard enough they can push someone out, which of course backfires when that person is strong or brutally stubburn enough to go "fuck this, I'm staying" and then everyone else gets more angsty and miserable, rather than figuring out how to work around that person's faults.
In contrast, my experience of disability groups seems to be that we have to be a bit more tolerant and understanding of each other, because you know that you are going to know, and need to put up with, these people for the rest of your life. Come what may, you can't stop being part of that disability group. So even though you don't agree with a whole bunch of things someone does, or has done, you still have to figure out on what level you relate to them or can be civilised with them, so it doesn't appear that you are having a go at them all the time, because that gets tedious pretty quickly.
Just my ovservations anyway.
It would be an interesting experiment, to have a post where you invite people to annonymously fess up to their worse sin; giving context of the situation without revealing names and places. You wouldn't want people to publicly judge each other as a result, even annonymously, because that could hurt people, but it would be interesting to see what people thought of each other's crimes, when they were faceless. Or you could do it in a way where the rules are, if you post your sin, you open yourself up to having any annonymous criticism levelled at you. I for one would be interested to see what random people who didn't know the people or circumstances involved, thought of my supposed sin.