100 days of Love and Hate - Day 33

[dalekboy]

Aliens killed by water
I've always hated this conceit. I really hated it in the movie version of Day of the Triffids. The semi-religious, inspired by War of the Worlds ending where, thanks to God's wisdom and foresight, Earth happens to be three-quarters covered in sea-water which is lethal to the triffids. Blearh! I remember a seeing it in a 1980's sci-fi horror film and hating it then, and I've since seen it used once or twice more. I hate it in old films, too.

It's a crappy, stupid, pathetic, lazy idea. Now if the aliens weren't breathing oxygen and they were allergic to water, I'd be willing to tolerate it. If they just had a fit, collapsed on the ground in shock, and died, I'd be happy enough. But inevitably the monster or alien is wandering around breathing away and then the water hits and anyone would think they were hit with acid.

There are actually people in the world who are allergic to water. They even have to be careful not to get too hot, lest they sweat. The water is fine being ingested, it just mustn't touch bare skin. Extreme cases go into anaphylactic shock if they get too wet, and it doesn't take them much to become too wet. We're talking glass of water.

There is not a single recorded case of them melting or exploding.

That said I don't mind seawater-as-acid in the Alien Nation TV series (I didn't like it in the film, but forgive the TV series which actually did some clever things with it) and I don't mind it in Signs, (because the film's not about monsters, invasion or any of that stuff, it's about a man rediscovering his lost faith, so what kills the aliens is totally unimportant except in that it's a step towards the priest's redemption) but they are the only two exceptions.




Harry Harrison
I should have waited until I got to Canberra to write this one. There I could go over my book shelves and have reminders of some of my favourite books. But instead I'll go from memory. Given that I'm very tired, this will be a little rough.

The very first Harrison book I picked up was the Stainless Steel Rat. Fabulous stuff, all written in first person, entertaining, funny, clever... I love that Slippery Jim diGriz is so full of himself but also so wonderfully fallible. There's still a couple of the later Stainless Steel Rat books I haven't read, but generally I find even the worst of them a reasonable read.

From there I started in on some of Harrison's other books. Technicolor Time Machine, about using time travel to make movies; Star Smashers of the Galaxy Rangers, a wonderful romp that sends up so many space operas and has an absolute ball doing it; Deathworld, fabulous concept, humans living on a planet that is totally hostile to human life. Bill the Galactic Hero is a personal favourite, taking the glory of war, galactic empire's, bureaucracy, etc. and giving it all a nasty, mocking, going over.

Then there's the West of Eden books, good solid sci-fi, set on an Earth where reptiles are the dominant lifeform. Wonderfully researched, brilliantly written, and plenty of good ideas.

I haven't read all Harrison's books, but I can honestly say that of what I have read, there have been no duds. Some may not appeal to your sense of humour, or be the style of SF you enjoy, but the writing is still good.

I was lucky enough to meet Harrison when he came to Melbourne in the early 80's. One of those authors where the adage 'you should never meet your heroes' doesn't count. A great public speaker and an excellent guest, he made my first convention experience a memorable one.

Somewhere in Melbourne, someone has a picture of Harry Harrison playing with my rubber chicken. The photo was taken as he compared it to the meal he had had a few nights before. Anyone ever comes across it, I want a copy.

Comments

[cheshirenoir.livejournal.com]

I still think that the Stainless Steel Rat series would make for either a stonking set of "mini-series" shows or even (if handled carefully and lovingly) some kick arse movies.

[martinlivings.livejournal.com]

It would be so easy to adapt these for TV or film. In fact, there are already scripts and storyboards. Otherwise known as the kick-arse 2000AD adaptations of said stories. :)

I gotta say, if anyone ever approached me to do a screenplay for any of the Stainless Steel Rat books (even the lame ones, like the early days series), I'd do it in a heartbeat!

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Thanks to that 2000 AD comic, I can only hope that there's a young James Coburn lookalike out there to star in it :)

[drhoz.livejournal.com]

it made a good comic in 2000AD :)


"Transatlantic Tunnel, Hurrah is good, too - alternate history where the US lost the War of Independance, and one of George's descendants has been hired to design and build a tunnel from the British Isles to the American Colonies.

[purrdence.livejournal.com]

So what do you think of Invader Zim?

[angriest.livejournal.com]

"The wettening...."

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

I think I will have to post about Zim *grin*

[angriest.livejournal.com]

Ambition runs through my veins like a giant army of rubber pants. The pants command ME!! DO NOT IGNORE MY VEINS!!!!

[strangedave.livejournal.com]

I thought it was just one of the things that made Signs idiotic. The whole conceit that the alien invasion isn't important, because aliens aren't as interesting as Mels turgid questioning of faith, was just offensive. That, and the idea that aliens could manage to conquer the earth without noticing all the damn water, being apparently as smart as spaniels. I really felt like the aliens were actually Kang and Kodos from the Simpsons.

[angriest.livejournal.com]

I think what makes the aliens being allerging to water in Signs so irritating for many viewers (myself included) was that it (a) felt extremely lazy on Shyamalan's part, and (b) came at the end of what had otherwise been - on the whole, and to me at least - a very tense and enjoyable SF thriller.

I think the only bit of Signs that's annoying is the alien smart enough to travel halfway across the galaxy, but so stupid it can't open a closed pantry door.

[angriest.livejournal.com]

Sorry, in that last paragraph I meant it to read "the only other bit of Signs that's as annoying". Sorry!

[stephen-dedman.livejournal.com]

Agreed. Or wear a spacesuit. No, it has to go into a potentially lethal environment naked.

If Shyamalan had given us an insight into the aliens that explained their behaviour (e.g. they're suicidal graffiti artists) the ending could have been okay. As it was, they're just boogeymen, and I can't help but wonder if Gibson had anything to do with that...

I disliked the movie of The Day of the Triffids, but even that was more forgivable than Signs; salt can kill plants, and triffids probably would be stupid enough to walk off a cliff into the ocean.

[purrdence.livejournal.com]

I'm still trying to wrap my head around Shyamalan also wrote the script to Stuart Little....

Lady in the Water

[rendragon.livejournal.com]

Apparently he wrote "Lady in the Water" for his kids. I haven't been to see it, so I don't know what sort of scary-factor it has...

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

These days I look at what a film was trying to achieve, and whether it did what it set out to do. Signs tried to be creepy and scary (tick). Signs was about a guy's questioning his faith and what restores it, and that worked for what it was (tick).

I find this is the only way I don't go mad.

Signs wasn't the first film to have naked aliens that seem incredibly stupid for an advanced race, and it won't be the last.

I had forgotten about the pantry door. Good creep scene. Very very stupid idea.

[thinarthur.livejournal.com]

Always regret missing HH when he came to that con. Ah the rubber chicken era, I recall you had 2, a main one and a stunt one. HH also worked on the early EC comics, both by himself and with Comic book great Wally Wood. They stopped using him when his sans Wood art didn't look so hot and from his comments in "Great Balls of Fire- a History of Sex in SF" he was very peeved that they have such a cult following now. Don't forget his greta overpopulation novel "Make Room, Make Room", made into the movie "Soylent Green"

I'm Melting....

[thinarthur.livejournal.com]

"The Wizard of Oz" had the great scene of the Witch melting when Dorothy hit her with the water meant for the burning Scarecrow, though when you think about it it is kind of dumb thing for her to leave round the castle. I recall some of the 80's Dr Who comics had Cybermen short circuiting when passing through water, which was really pathetic.

Re: I'm Melting....

[purrdence.livejournal.com]

Have you read Wicked?