Pre-trip

[dalekboy]

Still dreadfully depressed, have been for two or three days. Needy, emotional, and cuddly, not a good state to start my 40th birthday trip, but surprisingly I've now had two showers in a row where I haven't ended up sobbing! Yay! See? I'm virtually over the death of my daughter!

Dance-card in Melbourne very messy and disorganised, I waited too long on one person getting back to me, and now I haven't got much else organised. Which may not be a bad thing, as it'll mean (in theory) lots of rest, but still.

Nowhere near ready to leave, but really don't care. I'll head off tomorrow when I do, with what I have, and that'll be it. Not wanting to leave Sharon (who is doing better than I am by a country mile) but I actually think this trip is the best thing I could be doing for myself from an emotional/psychological standpoint. Eucla time is needed.

[Poll #1046939]

Comments

[sjkasabi.livejournal.com]

Arg, that was me, wasn't it? :(I am bad. Sorry. I have been going spare but just handed in my essay and as soon as I've had some sleep (2 hrs last night) I'll have a brain again. I've got "Danny in town" in my diary for Saturday, if you've still got space then. Otherwise we'll sort something out.

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

We can sort it tonight, as discussed on the phone :)

[redbraids.livejournal.com]

Safe travels!

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Thank you! *starts to actually pack*

[rendragon.livejournal.com]

Can do Sunday day or Monday night, but monday is better, so I put it in the poll (even though I'm sure you'll have had enough of me by then anyway)

[kaths.livejournal.com]

Heyho, sorry you've been feeling depressed :( I'm sure the trip will help though!

Don't worry if you can't fit me in this trip, I've gotten more than my fair share of you the last couple of times :)

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

*teasing* I knew you were sick of me!

If you wanted me to feel better, you could have at least used that nice icon of yours. This one isn't bad, but you come off looking a bit bloke-ish *grin*

[kaths.livejournal.com]

How's this one? Me with my pout face on, I don't think it has changed much :)

[babalon-93.livejournal.com]

damn, sorry you're not feeling good, I hope my radical feminist ranting over at Em's place isn't adding to your depression. I personally have been enjoying the respectful difference of opinion, but I know context can be hard to read sometimes on the internetz.

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Not at all. I've loved the to-ing and fro-ing between us, especially in trying to give you a possible male perspective and reasoning on some aspects of the sexist behaviour.

I started replying because, well, to me a lot of the reactions to Em's post were very offensively sexist to me as a male, not to mention giving my sex way more credit than we deserve. "All men who say this are thinking this way!" No, most of us aren't thinking that way at all, we are reacting the way we've learnt to with our own gender! So stop applying your logic to the situation, it doesn't work because there's not that much thought involved :)

One of the things I've liked about your posts and replies in particular is there was a bit more balance there.

At least part of the depression is, I wasn't meant to be able to do this trip, because Shaz should have been seven months pregnant. I'm still not dealing with the loss anywhere near as well as she has, which is an amazing reversal on the norm for us.

[bigevilogre.livejournal.com]

I have been very depressed as well. But your reasons are very real, mine aren't anything compared.
I have cried for you, and I don't cry for just anyone. WE're all connected by this earth no matter how far away, so on the road always remember that in a sense we are there, even if you can't see us.
I wish there were something I could do to make you happy. If I ever think of something, I'd take a shot at it.

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Have only been flitting through LJ, so haven't had the chance to reply until now.

I have been very depressed as well. But your reasons are very real, mine aren't anything compared.
Doesn't matter. It's not a competition and no matter what's caused it, the pain, dull, and despair of the depression are just as real for both of us.

You wanna make me happy? Look after yourself, try to live as good a life as you can. That's a good start :)

[bigevilogre.livejournal.com]

I'm working on getting moved to a place where I'll be happier. A lot of people in a couple forums stabbed me in the back when something that bothered me happened. When I get moved I'll have more friends in person. Out here, I have no one to hang out with. It's time to go back to where I grew up where old friends still live.