Who's reading?

[dalekboy]

At Conflux I was chatting with a mate and something got brought up to which I said 'I don't know if you saw my Livejournal post on such-and-such,' and she replied, 'I read everything you write.'

It kind of surprised me, mainly because I figure people have better things to do than read my LJ. Okay, I know I have a couple of hundred readers, but still my expectation is that they'll dip in from time to time, rather than read me regularly. Sure, there are people with whom I try to make sure I read all their posts, but I don't expect others to do the same with mine.

But when I stopped to think about it, I remembered a few comments from various people. A couple of folks who, on discovering this journal, went right back to the beginning and read through the whole thing. The people who commented on how they regularly go back and check to make sure they haven't missed posts. So, even if my friend was not quite that zealous, some people would appear to be.

So, this is a question for that small group of you that go to the extra effort to read most, if not all, of what I write on here. See answering it as a way to say thanks.

Why? Why read so much of what I'm carrying on about?

I have a fair few anonymous readers, people who don't have LJ's, or at least don't use them to comment. So what draws you here? I mean for many folks, we're friends, but that doesn't require you to read every bloody thing I write! For some, we've barely or never met. So what is it that keeps you coming back? Especially for periods like the last year where, let's face it, it's been a bit of a chore at times.

I'd prefer the casual readers, the folks who only bother with it when they just happen to see a post, to not respond.

For those of you who go out of your way to keep up with my written meanderings, no matter when you end up reading this, no matter if you don't have an LJ account, I'd love know why.

All comments screened unless you clearly tell me otherwise or end the comment with a "Yes".

Comments

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

See, you're a big surprise. I know how busy you are, and how many things you're trying to keep on top of, so I just assume you don't have time to read most of my stuff. That doesn't bother me, I know you're my friend, and being my friend doesn't require you to read all my ravings. I am actually a bit blown away by this...

For the record, I'm still getting replies to some of the older 100 Days posts, so it's never too late :P

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Well, we've finally met, so that's a good start to the whole 'in person' thing.

I sometimes think I'm way too good on the whole honesty thing... and then I think fuck it, I don't care *grin*

you hit tl;dr reasonably often
tl;dr? Not teasing, just could not figure out what that meant.

[meljane.livejournal.com]

Apart from you being a friend you write really interesting ,entertaining, confronting ,humorous,touching and even some posts that make me blush , the kinds of posts I wish I could write but I lack your writing talent .

On the whole I plainly like reading your entries and like quite few others do ,even like going back and reading past entries and checking that I haven't missed any and people will read or listen to anyone that spin a good story whether it be a fictional or non-fiction story .

You are a natural storyteller and you rock*hugs*

Yes

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

*blush*

No, seriously *blush*

You're a sweetie. But I have to say the only way to become a better writer is to write more, no matter what the possible reactions will be. I still get worried about how people will react to some of the 100 Days stuff, but to date there's only been one set of bad reactions, and that was as much to do with a mixture of poor writing on my part and people only reacting to the bits they could take badly, rather than the entire post.

*hugs*

Re: Why?

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Makes perfect sense. Every time someone like you reappears in my life, it's that really nice sense of shared history and familiarity that dates back to our youth.

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Fair enough :)

In the same way I struggle to read fiction now, I struggle with my friends pages. Slabs of text just bowl me over, but I at least try to skim read, which is what I've generally assumed happens with my stuff, since it's often big slabs of text.

[stephbg.livejournal.com]

I only became seriously interested in lj after Swancon 2007. I'd seen you around Swancons over the years, and heard you speak as the Fan Guest of Honour last year, so I friended you to check out your journal in convenience. I stumbled into the middle of the 100 days posts and an incredibly intense period in your life, and had to do some catch up reading to get the full (or at least a bit more) context.

I continued to read because I am fascinated by the honesty and rawness of your posts; I am familiar with the people if not the individuals you write about; I like your pictures; and you're occasionally amusing. When you wrote that you're obsessed with lj comments I recognised that and was happy to feed your addiction :-)

All this has made me post in my own lj far more openly than I might have otherwise. Yes, you have Influenced Me.

I don't obsessively read every word you write, but I do tend to read almost everything on my flist, so it works out much the same. LJ is my new drug (and home page), a drip-feed of the fascinating conversations and personalities I used to only get to enjoy once per year.

You can show this comment if you like.
Yes

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Yeah, my Friends List is my homepage. It's the only way for me to hope to keep up. I don't read every word of most other folks LJs. And I tend to have the choice of either reading a bunch and maybe commenting on one or two, or reading none and commenting on a bunch... or posting! Just don't have the concentration for lots of text.

Comment addiction is a terrible thing. "It's been up for nearly half an hour and no-one's replied!"

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Thank you, and it's nice that I was able to put a face to the name successfully - Thank you, stroke-enhanced memory!

Sympathy is a funny thing. I'm happy to receive it, so long as I'm not getting used to it, or waiting for it. I think that's one of the problems, people find that if they troll for sympathy they get it, it's an easy form of attention-getting.

So what you then get from people is post after post talking about how dreadful their life is because of this addiction to sympathy, but it starts to become self-fulfilling prophecy - because all they write about is how awful life is, that's all they end up seeing in their lives.

I try to write the truth about how I'm feeling. If I'm broken, I say that. If I'm horny, I say that. If I'm pissed off with the people who want to run big cons just for the sake of big cons... well, look forward to an equally big rant in 100 days at some point *grin*

My life's good, overall, but I'm broken enough at the moment that I'm actually really grateful for the kind thoughts of others, way moreso than normal, so thank you :)

[linstar.livejournal.com]

Cause you're you. You're absolutely wonderful, and the stuff you write about is hugely thought provoking. I read it and think about what experiences I've had that would possibly compare... and realise there's nothing close :)

And it gives me a chance to know things baout you that I wouldn't think to ask you when I'm around you! This way, I get prompted to ask you about lots of things! :)

Lots of love and hugs always

Yes if you want to.

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

and realise there's nothing close
No, but your experiences are yours, and I suspect that if we were to talk about them, there would likely be some that I'd go "How the hell did you cope with that?!"

Always feel free to ask me questions. If I don't want to answer, I won't :)

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Dammit I'm blushing again!

No words, just thank you very, very much. Oh, and yes, do the Nullarbor (but take your time).

*wanders off shyly*

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Wait! You don't have a mobile any more? Oh dear God, who have I been sending the occasional COCK! to?!

I so wish I was joking about that.

We've been friended a good while, to have read everything since then is a pretty big chunk of text. I still find it amazing.

What on Earth was the sentence from the closing that made such a difference to you? Don't get me wrong, I'm glad you got some benefit from my words, but one sentence?!

Dude, I like you plenty. We didn't get to talk much, but I was really thrilled to see you at Pancakes. You can say whatever it is you need to say to me, when you need to say it, and I'm not going to think less of you for it. Within reason. If you tell me you're voting for the Liberals next election, you're in a world of hurt *grin*

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

~ How could I not reply? Thank you for the exceptionally kind words.

I get the shy, socially awkward thing. But seriously, I rarely bite, so come up and say hi. You have my full permission to talk to me now, so there's no excuse.

Well apart from feeling shy, which I get :)

Feel free to stop being anonymous on here as a starting point :)

[kaths.livejournal.com]

How could I not? :)

It's rare to get such an insight into someone's life, and there's been some real gems amongst your posts (not that the others aren't... you know what I mean).

I'm also a bit OCD, so once I start, I have to read right through :) I occasionally skim through the TMI stuff, but it's all essentially read.

LJ is my home page too.

yes

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Thank you, I'm not so surprised by you given how much we tend to yak about and share, but it's still complimentary.

*hugs*

Re: Why?

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

*blush*

I'm sure you're trying to seduce me. Keep going *grin*

Seriously, thank you very much.

[cassiphone.livejournal.com]

You write with a raw honesty that I find incredibly compelling. I think you're one of the most personally revealing bloggers that I've come across!

Your writing voice is funny and entertaining, even when you're sharing your miseries.

So, yeah. Keep doing what you're doing!

(yes, happy for everyone to see this)

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Thank you. You've given me a couple of the most encouraging comments I've received about this LJ. It's really appreciated.

I'm also up for constructive criticism. It may not change anything, but I'm up for it *grin*

[lilysea.livejournal.com]

I read most (though not all) of your posts

...to keep an eye on you and make sure that you are doing OK (since the tragic event of this year);

...because you have interesting things to say on a variety of subjects;

...because I admire your ability to express your opinions and your raw honesty and bravery;

...because you are funny and make me laugh out loud;

...because I admire your connection to the Australian landscape;

...because sometimes you are wise and good at dealing with people, and I feel that reading your stuff might make me wiser and better at interacting with people, especially new people.

(yes)

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Expect my wiseness levels to drop after I have all four of my wisdom teeth out!

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

PS I know you don't read them all, because my saucy posts are just too damned arousing for a lady of your delicate sensibilities.

Re: why I read

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Not much I can say to that except thank you. That was a wonderfully honest and open reply.

PS - I'm not worried about you hitting on Sharon. She probably wouldn't notice if you hit on her, she's got no interest in anyone, me included, but she will go all shy and blushy regarding the compliment, if you'll allow me to pass it on :)

PPS - Your Tiki impersonation is wonderful. I meant to tell you that at pancakes :)

[leecetheartist.livejournal.com]

Yes, feel free to post this.

You're on my friends list, which isn't huge. I like to have the opportunity to keep in touch with people whom I rarely see, typically only at conventions.

You are indeed a most compelling read, as others have said, sensitive, emotional, passionate, humorous, raw, confronting, entertaining, creative and honest. It's very readable.

*And you use LJ cuts*. Thank you.

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

My rules of thumb on LJ cuts are -
- is what I've written longer than a page. If not, probably don't need to worry about it.
- if it is, is it something that's so important, or has it been so long since I last posted, that I shouldn't cut it?
- is it full of bad language, potentially offensive content, or is it personal in a way that some folks may not wish to read? If so, cut.
- is it a meme? Then 95% of the time, cut.
- photographs? Some people are still on dial-up, or have limited bandwidth. Cut. It's polite. There is room for the occasional exception, of course.

I figure if I haven't done a good enough job on the lead-in, or my writing as a whole isn't good enough to make people want to click the cut, then I shouldn't be taking up huge chunks of their Friends Page in the first place with my drivel.

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

And yes, it was lovely to get the chance to yak with you one-on-one. Hope to make it a bit more of a regular event in my social calendar *smile*

Re: why oh why?

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Then you could at least let your pusher see you! *grin*

[mireille21.livejournal.com]

I treat LJ like a conversation, therefore if you've got something to say I'm listening. Now that doesn't mean I read *everything* people post (my friends list is fairly extensive too) but I do like to try, or at least skim and then go back for the stuff which looks most important/ interesting.

BTW, if I ever comment, uatomatically consider I don't mind it being unscreened, because most of the time I'll probably forget to say 'yes'.

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Okay, you're unscreened from now on unless you say otherwise :)

*hugs*

[tearsxintherain.livejournal.com]

I read most, but not all.. depending on how much time I have and how many references there are to Dr Who (hehehe).

In all seriousness, I really love your rawness, honesty and writing style. You manage to convey how you're feeling with depth and beauty. And I agree with a lot of what I can only describe as 'your life philosophy'. And it helps me rethink mine a little.

I admire that you can be so honest. Your bravery in sharing helps me overcome my fears sometimes. I don't think I would ever have shared as much as I have on my LJ without it.

yes

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Thank you. You know your words mean a lot :)

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

RE: the TMI stuff - I've thought about how better to phrase things, and wondered about putting in less detail or info, but even if I did, it would still be too much for many folks, so why dilute the message if people are still gunna have a problem with it? I don't want people to be uncomfortable (most of the time, anyway) but where do you stop when it comes to censoring what you're talking about?

Thank you for being so kind about my babblings. I look forward to us actually meeting one day :)

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

You big silly!

[shrydar.livejournal.com]

I'll start with my general position, then get a little more personal ;)

To be quite frank, if someone's LJ is not sufficiently interesting for me to read every single post (though the more they post, the higher the bar), it doesn't stay on my Default View for very long. And if you're off my default view, you're not so likely to survive the next flist cull. You post a fair bit, so you must rate reasonably highly ;). I'm also a completist - I don't like doing things by halves. There are only two or three novels I've ever given up on, one movie I've almost walked out of, and I try to get to every rehearsal for a performance.

Friending policies and my own neuroses aside, your candour and self analysis tend to make all of your posts well worth my time. Always thought provoking, rarely dull, and as stephbg pointed out further up - your glastnost can be quite inspirational. You sometimes say things that I've not had the courage to speak out on myself, so in that regard reading and occasionally commenting acts to support views I've yet to make a stand on. (not that you're always right, of course ;-). Your predilection for Doctor Who is another point in your favour, as are your anonymous polls that allow me to influence others conception of what your readership consider to be normal. Reading the results of those is interesting, too.

yes.

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Well, if I was always right, wouldn't that be rather dull? :-)

I do like the polls. Though it seems as if I can never cover all the bases on the answers - there's always some bugger who says "You didn't give me an option for..." and then I have to hunt them down and kill them.

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

I don't expect or want people to trawl back through it all - I mentioned that because it surprises me that people have. I was after the folks like you, that started reading and rarely miss a post. That idea fascinates me.

I miss you guys. I never saw a lot of you, but I liked you. But you both seem happy enough, and that's the important thing :)

[bugs-jenny.livejournal.com]

As many others have said here, I find your willingness to speak about the very personal details of your feelings very interesting - I'm just nosy that way ;-) I really enjoy understanding how other people think & feel, but it's often hard to get that information because people don't share it. Myself included really - even though I like hearing about other people, I'm pretty shy and don't share much about my innermost feeling!

So thankyou for sharing your life...
(yes)

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

You're welcome :)

Most people are shy about sharing their lives. I think they are worried about being ridiculed, or hurt, or they may just feel it's no one's business but their own. All are valid reasons.

For me this journal is a way for the people who are important to me to know my life in detail. Sometimes more detail than they'd like, but there you go. Other people just happen to get to see it also :)

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

Wow, thank you. I often feel I'm coming across as a bit of an over-the-top, know-it-all wanker. I don't claim to know it all, but I know what I believe based on what I do know, and hold to those opinions firmly (and loudly) until given more info or a reason to change them. And that can come across badly.

Thank you, seriously.

Re: A way of saying thanks...

[dalekboy.livejournal.com]

What a fabulous thank you! Thank you :)

And I'm genuinely glad that some of my posts enrich your week. It's why I tend to be conscious of all the "This is the latest way my life has turned to crap," posts. I tend to write the way I talk and act, so the good humour that often pervades them is genuine and I think that comes across.

By the way, you're not being sneaky. There are plenty of folks who read me and don't have me friended, for all sorts of good reasons :)